Last Day of my life…as me!

I am someone who is strong, who never accept defeats, someone who don’t know how to cry. I live my life to the fullest; I enjoyed life but didn’t realize what it really meant for me. There are so many things that happen in my life. There are lots of ups and down, lot of tears but there’s a lot of laughter. Life is so easy for me. I been into vices, I even allow to be manipulated by other people. I believed that was the most beautiful life I ever had. When I got my work here in Manila, life seems to be nothing but enjoyment, nothing but fun, nothing but addiction, nothing but competing others but every time I got home, I feel that something is missing in my life.

Life must go on as they say but every time I open my room when coming home, all alone, I am not aware that tears are coming in my eyes. I don’t know if I am just missing my family or is it because I am just alone. Things get worse and worse, there’s emptiness in me but I can’t figure out what is that emptiness and how I can resist it.

One time a friend invited me to visit somewhere else one Tuesday night of August. From there, I met Him again. I knew Him before but I really don’t have a relationship with Him. That was the day that I told myself to love Him again, to allow Him to stay in my life. I don’t know but every time I come home there’s a smile in my face and slowly the emptiness in me is filled with so much joy and love.

These coming days in my life is very significant to me coz He’ll be taking my life from me. I’ll be submitting myself to Him, totally submitting my whole life and this life is not mine anymore, He will owned my life. He will wash my life and take all those bad memories, He will take all the pain in my heart and He will fill it with so much love and I’ll never be the same again.

I might be leaving my family, my friends and the people that surrounds me because of this journey I have with Him, I know I will be happy with Him and I will share the love that I never felt before. I’m ready to take the cross with Him.

I will be free...

 John 8:36 So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed.

There are times in our life that we need to decide for ourselves. We need to choose a path for our own. We have to decide for something and make a stand for that decision in our life. Sometimes because of that decision we might hurt other people, we might lost our traditional beliefs, we have to leave our love ones because of that decision. It hurt to leave and to decide but if that's the only way to save them all then I really have to go for it.

Presently, I am preparing myself for the best thing that will ever happen to my life. It's something that no money or any materials things can buy. I can't imagine how happy I am now because of this celebration that will happen to me very soon.

I know I am not the same person anymore after this. I have to bound myself for a lifetime commitment and I will never be the same. I will never be alone anymore. All these things are not accident, there's a great reason for everything and no matter what reason that would be...I am and will always be grateful for that reason.

I don't know what's the significance of November 27 for me coz this is also the day when I pledge and oath as a teacher and now November 27 and 28, 2010 I will pledge for another significant event in my life.